HUSBANDS -- SHOW AND TELL!
MAN -- It must be admitted that Freud was not altogether wrong. A man's primary motivation for marriage, whether he realizes it or not, is sexual fulfillment. This is as it should be--the human race must go on. "Be fruitful, and multiply" (Gen. 1:28). There are secondary reasons for a man's need of marriage: the desire for a loving relationship, spiritual companionship, a home, children. WOMAN -- Although sexual fulfillment is important to a woman, it is not the main factor which draws her into marriage. The primary motivation is her need for the security of a sustained love relationship. This is a basic requirement of her nature because of her vulnerability, especially in the realm of motherhood. Her secondary reasons for marriage are much the same as a man's. It has been said that a man gives love to get sex, and a woman gives sex to get love. HUSBAND -- The sexual drive, so vital a factor in bringing a man to wedlock, continues to be basic in marriage. The tendency of his nature is toward direct sexual fulfillment. This causes him to neglect verbal expressions of love which he considers to be unnecessary in achieving his goal. WIFE -- Not so the woman! Her emotional make-up requires verbal expression from her mate to assure her of sustained love and security. This is what a man erroneously considers non-essential. The fact of the matter is that these expressions are all-important to her, and it is a wise man who realizes this. Most contend that it is just a weakness of the individual female. Brother, beware; it is God-given nature! MALE -- It is much too easy for the husband to consider the proof and expression of his love to consist of his provision for the family, maintenance of the home, faithfulness in the sexual realm, etc. But here is where he errs, simply because he is looking at their relationship from his male standpoint without adequately taking into account the female point of view. All harmony requires balance! FEMALE -- While the wife appreciates her husband's material and physical sharing, her nature requires something more; that something is so simple and yet so vital that deprived of it she fade into frigidity or even run into ruin. And this can happen no matter how copiously she may he supplied with the finest of material things. For the female, bless her heart, her husband must not only show--he must also tell! MALE EXPRESSION -- What a man may consider to be extra or even extraneous, a woman of necessity deems essential. She not only must be shown that she is loved, but she must be told so. The key to her well-being is not just, "Say it with flowers, but heart in mouth, say it with words!
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MJStanford
Home | MJS | Hungry Heart Devotional | Testimony | Memorial | Order Books | Email Best viewed in Explorer 6+ or Netscape 6+, 1024x768 screen display, 16 bit color or higher, and JavaScript on 900MB (2,000+ pages of text) Copyright © 1996-2008 withChrist.org Last updated: January 01, 2008 (Materials by Miles J. Stanford are republished here under exclusive permission from the author.)
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